Outta Whack

I literally was crying in the shower, even though nothing drastic has happened to me.

Ever wake up feeling blue, for seemingly no clear explanation?  That happens to me every once in a while and it got me to wondering why this pops up every now and then. It happened this past Tuesday morning, I literally was crying in the shower, even though nothing drastic has happened to me.  When I feel this way though, I tend to look back on my life and beat myself up for the things I did, didn’t do, and wish I had.  I always compare my life to the dream I had when I was a fifth grader, which at this point in my life I should have been married for 15 years, had more kids, a big house etc etc. So, I let myself cry for a little bit while getting ready for work.  By the time Piper got up, I was closer to my old self, keeping busy with the mundane necessities of getting out the door on time.

By the time I got to work my mood had regulated to normalcy.  I was busy with work and my work friends. I love my job, because  I get to help the neediest of our population. I work with some pretty awesome people, and we have fun while getting our job done.

Flash forward to me at night in bed, reading.  Now, I feel utterly satisfied and happy with my life.  I laughed at how my mood could change so much in one day.  I can go from feeling so blue to feeling utterly comfortable and happy.

Then, as God always does, the information came to me right when I needed it.  I happen to come to an article in Oprah’s magazine, called, Vicious Cycle, and it’s all about perimenopause.  It can happen when your periods start becoming irregular, which mine are, and around the age of 47, which I am.  Damn, Damn, Damn. It’s all about how your progesterone and estrogen levels can get thrown out of whack, and mess with your brain, body, and moods.

The article went on to say there is help, with anti-depressants or hormones, and you should talk with your gynecologist.

Guess I gotta make an appointment, before I get too out of whack.